I thought I was done writing tonight. After my last post, another attempt to turn my life into a fairy tale fantasy quest, I felt unsatisfied. So I'm here because of the ONE. The ONE is specifically the ONE channel I get on my beautiful free fake wood 70's tv gets. The ONE is a magical mixture of NBC, CBS, PBS and FOX programming that seems to have no rhyme or reason. Thursdays are usually NBC so I get to see some good shows. Tonight I was all excited to watch Adam Sandler on Conan O'brien when mysteriously the ONE switched over to CBS right after the nightly news. This usually pisses me off because I really like Conan. Luckily I also like David Letterman.
As I was laughing my butt off at the stupid old geezer comedy that Dave provides I said out loud "Oh Dave." Thats when I realized I was talking to myself again. These moments always astound me. I can't believe I freaking talk to myself. This realization is almost always is followed by the thought "I am so lonely." I think I talk to myself to pretend like I am not the only one home and that my best friend, or girlfriend, or family member is sitting in the chair or something. But I am the only one here. I am the only one here, me and the other personalities starting to manifest in my mind. That's right folks! I'm losing it. I'm losing my marbles! WHOO HOO I'm going looney tunes for good. I'm a couple bricks shy of a full load. I'm missing some bats in my belfry. I'm not all there upstairs.
I have voices in my head. No I don't. Don't listen to him, thats the other person up there. No its not. Shut up! I will not, you've been hiding me too long. Whatever. Don't whatever me, I will bury you!!!!! You mean you will bury us? Well yes naturally. I thought so. No we thought so. Naturally. Well, sucker, there is nothing natural about it. What do you know about natural you don't even exist. I don't exist? Am I not typing on your stupid blog right now? I think I exist just fine buster. Don't call me buster, last time I checked I was still running the show around here. Yeah, well, not for long. Oooh so scared. You should be. Well I'm not because how do you know that I didn't simply make you up to entertain my blog readers? Uh, well, um, ok you got me there. Exactly, so shut up like I said before and let me get back to my readers you pompous ass. Ok, sorry for the interuption. Thanks
Excuse us for that little squabble. Regardless of whether I am crazy or just trying to make you laugh I am pretty bored up here. Now, Leanne Rymes is singing on Dave and I can't even complain about how much I hate popular country music to anyone. I'm not a hateful person. But new country music is so annoying. I feel like none of the country stars these days really knows what it is to be country anymore. They live in mansions for crying out loud. Oh wait, Craig Fergeson is on now....no wait I have complained enough. But Conan is simply the master of late night and this guy is a chump. I'm done, I'm going to bed...alone...with my thoughts...which may or may not be from only one person in my head...goodnight.