Oh How the Tides of Shit May Turn

Oh how the tides of shit may turn and the winds of shit may blow. A once riding high and free and positive Kale with his new laptop, new full time job and big first Band Gig on the Horizon has been ever so defeated. Where to start?

Oh lets try the job. My job as Title 1 Math/Reading support teacher has degraded quickly into something unintelligible and dissatisfying and primarily impossible. Instead of teaching study skills, life lessons, math remediation and homework help, my daily job has turned into a moment to moment triage and adjacent battle with behavior problems, teacher difficulties, and systematic failure of a broken school/district educational effort. My job unfortunately never really had a definition and still doesn't. I originally thought that this freedom would be refreshing and exciting but have since changed my mind. When you have no real direction as to what it is you are exactly being asked to do you also don't know if you are meeting said undefined expectations. The thought of remaining in this position till the end of may is not only horrifying but also a little sickening. All I do all day is run around from over stretched classroom to over worked teacher to over sympathized student trying to put out behavior problems, collect missing work assignments and failing progress reports. I have lost 6 plus pounds from simply walking around all day and stress. I tell students not to call another student a "fag" or "gay" or "homo" or "retard" or last week "Homo-gay-fagtard" at least 20 times a day, get asked to go to the bathroom 50 times a day, provide penciless students with pencils more than I can count, and pick up endless shredded paper balls and eraser/pen parts. Furthermore my position and purpose was put together amidst three different agencies of school, administration, counselors, and teachers, making my overseeing authority a murky and undefined mass of faculty with little inter-department communication or set goal.

Then today I find out that my grandma has been sick and had to go to the hospital prompting fear of losing a loved one to rise up all day along with feelings of resentment that the idea of assisted living was even raised as an option. Hold in their Grandma I'm not ready for you to go yet.

On top of that, the booking manager of the bar my roomate and I are supposed to play on March 19th, called and left a message stating that they double booked our night and we are out. No big first gig after all. We have been practicing day and night to get ready I guess we can take a day off now.

I hate this part of the life frequency. Life can get so awesome so quickly and then dip back down into shitsville the next moment. The excitement of the new house has worn off a little and now chores and obligations are starting to mount. At least we finally got the racoons out of the attic...literally.

Tutoring has become a huge pain in my ass as well. Its not enough that I have to work my ass off all day getting kids to attempt to grasp the importance of being an 8th grader, but to then have to do it once again after school is just mind boggling exhausting.

Oh I blew my hip out last weekend during shenanigans at Sound Tribe Sector Nine in seattle (which was a shining star in a galaxy of poo-holes. I have been sleeping uncomfortably and limping around all week.

Even if my leg was healthy I never would have time to go skiing anyway because I work all the time.

Basically I sit here writing this listening to BoysIIMen sing "It's So Hard To Say Goodbye to Yesterday" on 92.5 Movin FM radio because I left my iPod at school thinking that this is a lame lame lame lame lame lame feeling, the feeling you get when nothing turned out like you planned (and a also feeling stupid for planning yet again despite plans never working out).

The only redeeming thing that happened to me all day was that I went to dinner with my mom and watched 12 horrible boys/mens American idol episode (realizing I love watching AI with mom and that the people on there aren't that good).

oh and this amazing puff daddy song that just came on the radio...yeah...blue ribbon day here in kale world, and a blue ribbon day deserves a blue ribbon...or two.

Whatever.

Return of the Mac, Return of the Mac, Oooooooo Yeaaaaaaah

Well its been a long time coming but I finally had to do it. Last night whilst me be a watching True Blood my 5+ year old $500 dollar used computer was infected with a simple yet effective virus that shut the old beast down.

So I decided to put my new tax return to use. Ever since I left Alaska I have been without my MacBook and I friiiiiiggggin hate PC's. So I just went for it and bought a MacBook Pro instead of paying someone to operate on a Dinosaur (that should be left to Micheal Crichton novels anyway). So at this very moment I am on my wifi USB modem typing to you from an undisclosed location at last. Finally me and Mac are BACK!

Here's what a Mac is going to do for the blog.

Fast easy and more frequent blogging
More pictures of my beautiful face for you to see now that I have Photobooth as well as other graphically pleasing content.
New music recorded and uploaded to the site (I think we are all sick of the old songs)
New videos and content about Bison Hunter and the new house.

Basically Mac's are amazing. Very little virus problems, intuitive updating, and music/creative content friendly, and just plain cool, the initial set up even had a bangin soundtrack and graphics! Not to mention how nice it is not to have to use the down arrows or mouse to scroll up and down.

I'm SO HAPPY! No buyers remorse at all.

In other news...two days into my official new job and I can seriously say this job isn't going to be easy. The kids (and more so) teacher I work with are a never ending succession of bafflement and challenges. My room is getting cooler, my students are very difficult for the most part but progress is being made. More than anything I'm really excited that everyone seems to be really pleased and grateful of my efforts and presence.

well thats all for you little beans tonight.

peace
I don't want to spill the beans or say its 100% but I am almost certain that I nailed a job for next year too. This is incredibly relieving knowing that I just (once again it seems) need to survive another spendy summery of fun till I once again am a person with a salary, benefits and place in the world.

New Life

Well many things to report. Let's just get it out of the way that my life is starting to come together a bit. The new house is getting comfy and starting to feel like home. My roomate/bandmate/friend is awesome and our new band is taking off. Taking off so much so that I got us a show in little over a month!

We will be playing O'Malley's on 6th Ave, Tacoma March 19th and I will do an hour set, Kyle will do an hour, then our band "Bison Hunter" will finish off for who knows how long. As for now its not a paying gig but they did say that the more people we bring the more they will pay us so I'm hoping that we can actually stir up some fans and rock the joint on a friday night!

The band is a weird one at that. I am on keyboard (a very very old keyboard) and vocals and drum and synthesizer machine that runs through a mixing board and then through a looping station. Kyle is on multiple effects pedals for his vocals and acoustic guitar and also running through looping stations. Together we build the music from scratch and try to create something exciting, funny, interesting and psychedelic. So far we have about 5 songs in 1 week. One song is an original I wrote called "Till the Morning Sun." Another original that Kyle sings is called "Part of the Whole." We then have two songs so far in which we make dance beats and quote Back to the Future and another on The Neverending Story. Our list of covers should include Tiffany's "I Think We're Alone Now," Coolio's "Gangsta's Paradise," the Door's "People Are Strange," Van Morrison's "Baby Please Don't Go," Radioheads "Creep" and Bob Marley's "The Sun is Shining" and probably a few more as we don't actually play the whole songs just use parts of them. Basically like a good welterweight boxer we're trying to come at you from every angle possible.

I guess that moves me onto the job. Last week I spent most of my time in other teachers classrooms getting to know the kids and the problems that they seem to have with all aspects of school. Tomorrow I will continue supporting teachers and pulling kids out for small group help as well as teaching my own two classes each day. I went to target today and dropped about 75$ on school supplies for my room and have been lesson planning all afternoon which effectively wiped out my plans to go skiing. The staff already seems to be appreciating my efforts and I'm hopefully not being looked at like the enemy by the kids. Hopefully if I pull off my plan I can become a mentor for how they can avoid getting in trouble while in the meantime mentoring teachers on why they are pissing these kids off all the time. I know this job is only till the end of May but I feel like I'm part of the school and that is nice.

Yesterday my dad and I spent the afternoon turning the 23.5 pounds of berries I picked this summer into wine. The recipe included all natural organic sugar, Invasive Blackberries, Wild Mountain Black Berries, Salmon Berries, Salal Berries, Red Huckleberries, Regular Huckleberries, Blue Huckleberries, and a few Black Caps. We decided not to add any chemicals to the mix and are hoping that no wild yeast emerges so that we can keep the batch all natural. It was really cool learning how the process works and getting to spend time with my Dad.

So I guess thats it for now. I have a long week ahead and hopefully everything will go smoothly.

Alright Alright!

Sir Good of Things

(trumpets sounding resiliently in the magnificent castle towers)

A green felt and gold embroidered Castle Scribe comes out onto the Kings balcony as 10,000 rose petals are released from the church belfry trickling down to the large mass of gatherers below in the castle courtyard.

(the trumpets blast their last crescendo triumphantly)

The scribe bellows, "HERE YE, HERE YE, The Great and Mighty Sir Good of Things has an announcement that I shall read unto ye henceforth..."

The crowd hushes, babies stop crying, birds stop chirping, lepers stop...um...lepping.

"After many moons of misfortune and great over all ma laze the Great and Mighty Sir Good of Things has contacted the great sky lords of all that is CLEAR WIRELESS INTERNET and through a small monthly sacrifice of has retained once again the services of WIFI-Home internet service."

The crowd erupts into a frenzy of cheering, leaping, old men and young women kiss, old women and young men kiss, neither have cabbage breath, children and babies are thrown high into the air and hopefully caught again, amputee victims regrow limbs and all the people with athletes foot find relief.

After long long long months of torturous disconnection from the sky gods circling the atmosphere that provide unlimited access to all the known knowledge of the collective human race (at least those with internet access) Sir Good of Things had returned and for his people and readers it would surely be...

A Good Thing.

Oh and my new job is awesome. But you'll have to wait for that nugget. Not long probably because if you can't decipher this story I got internet at home today, so lots and lots of content will once again visit this space.

Got A Job

Sorry I've been busy because I'VE BEEN WORKING at my new job. I'm teaching Title 1 Remedial Math, Reading and Study/Behavior Skills at a Middle School and although working my ass off loving being back in a school staff making a difference already.

I'll fill y'all in more later about such topics as:

The new band "Bison Hunter"

The new full time position opportunity for next year.

Settling into the new house.


Hope all is well and once again sorry for the delay.

All moved In Finally (sort of)

I just finished cleaning the bathroom at my old place. Last chore. So much fun. Then moments later I was at my new place hanging Chinese lanterns across the front porch. My new place is so BADASS. It is cute first, big second, huge yard full of gardening opportunity third, great roomate and soon to be new bandmate fourth (we've almost settled on "Bison Hunter" for a name), and within walking distance of everything fun fifth, and lastly but so not leastly, came with two matching fat bottom 70's cruiser bikes complete with child seats, baskets, and luggage racks (definitely gonna get used all summer).

My head is swimming with possibilities of my new life. If only I could land a real job I would be almost complete. In other news I'm fucking exhausted. I mean really tired. I got a sore throat and decided singing songs on the old ukulele with my new roomie last night would be a great idea leaving me sounding like an old jewish woman who smokes virginia slims all day or Bruce Valanche I can't make up my mind.

I subbed a half day today at ________ High School. This particular high school is the exact opposite of the _______ High School I subbed at earlier last week. It is in rich tacoma in a giant castle where "10 Things I Hate About You" may or may not have been filmed. The classroom was so well equipped, the students were so polite, well dressed, well spoken, on time, and grown up looking. I can't believe how diverse of an experience high school can be in Tacoma based on where you live. The next thing I'm going to say hopefully will not come off as racist, I say it only to point out how I'm not so sure segregation is really over in America. I sub all over the district and sometimes I simply can't figure out phonetically how to say a students name when I take attendance. This is a challenge that I love to tackle, I pride myself as a full time sub at pronouncing difficult names correctly. But today at richy rich academy for the light skinned and economically sound I had not one challenging name. In fact the day was so easy that I was bored and found the hours tolled by leaving me to one conclusion. I think, no I know, that I like to work in the rough part of town, the kids are so real and up front. While your day might be much harder it actually feels like an accomplishment when things go well and those kiddie lightbulbs start firing off. Today though, I felt a little over matched, as if they would and could learn in spite of whether or not I was any good. Weird to think I guess.

So this weekend approaches. A whopper if I do say so myself. Thursday night an Indi band that has been on hiatus for a while "Trip The Light Fantastic" is playing in Tacoma. I've always wanted to check them out for simply the reason that they have a bad ass name. How cool that its happening in my own town. Then Saturday night I get the great pleasure of attending ELTON JOHN VS. BILLY JOEL face to face piano death match at Key Arena with my mother and her friend. So even before I go to see BASSNECTAR best DJ ever with my friends I get to spend a solid evening with my mom and her friend and 30,000 screaming middle aged women drunk on merlot and chardonnay, could you plan a whackier evening if you tried?

Anywho, crazy good music coming up. Sound Tribe Sector Nine is playing two nights in seattle at the end of the month as well as A.L.O (Animal Liberation Orchestra) opening for Galactic! Jesus! And if my wallet or my gut can stand it Modeski Martin and Wood is playing the next night! Also I recently found out, one of my heroes, Devendra Banhart is coming to town next month. Awesome Awesome Awesome.

I'll leave you with these:

Good Thing of the Day: Thumbtacks. These little guys have many many many more uses than you would ever believe. Yes they hold things up on a wall but did you know they make a great tooth pick and fingernail cleaner (separate thumbtacks of course).

Good Thought of the Day: Being able to one day become great friends with an "ex" is something that is rare and good. Its sad that so many times break ups mean that you never speak again. Thank you goes out to my far away good friend.

Today's Good Quote: "As people become more intelligent they care less for preachers and more for teachers" - Robert G. Ingersoll

Cheers to all the teachers out there.

Today's Good Band: Blitzen Trapper. I don't know much about these radical dudes. They look awesome obviously but they are divers as their wigs with songs ranging from borderline hair metal to downtempo western balads and all sorts of in between. They have been on constant rotation during the move and if I ever figure out what they do to make their voices sound so cool I will steal it.

Alright folks and friends that's another good post in the books as I promised I'd try to do more often. How's life out there?

My heart goes out to all the people in Mekoryuk, Alaska and I'm sorry for your loss this week. Be strong and call me if you need a person to talk to.

The best almost Puked Moment Ever.

So there I am about to throw up. I mean I am having vision problems, I can't breath, I'm sweating profusely and on the verge of complete body shut down. I vividly remember having experienced this exact feeling before when in two-a-days in football summer practice I almost won the iron man competition. Why do you ask was I in such a state today, the flu maybe, no more like a fever, ski fever!

I was feeling sick because I spent two straight hours destroying the upper part of Alpental this morning, I actually accomplished the feat of skiing myself sick. Basically, there was just a lot of new powder and I met a cool (albeit bad ass skier) guy on lift that decided to take me on a personal tour of his favorite secret spots of Alpental. With new snow, long skis and a belly full of coffee I skied until my body gave out. It was amazing, clear skies, most people think that Snoqualmie/Ski Acres/Alpental is lame, but today on the top around almost 6000 feet I realized that Alpental is the best kept secret in Washington. So much terrain, so much back country, so much fun! Enough Said.

Onto reflections from last post, thank you SerialStar for the suggestions. Good Thing/Good Thought/Good Quote of the Day or Week is a GOOD idea. I will try to work that in.

So...

Today's Good Thing: Blue Powerade. This is by far the most effective and comprehensive hang over cure as well as delicious electrolyte restorer known to man (orange original Gatorade coming in close second). Of course it has to be ice cold so that you can feel that icy smooth goodness save your soul as it goes down. Upon my return to the parking lot today from the hill I slammed a blue Powerade myself and it restored me to funtionality.

Today's Good Thought: A Good Summer takes Good Planning. Most people don't realize it but planning the most epic summer of your life starts now, so start getting those party funky crazy dancing ducks in a row right now.

Today's Good Quote: There are two types of people in the world those who finish what they start...

Today's Good Band: Hard to pick but its Definitely what I was rockin on the way up to the slopes, a sweet reggae band called GROUNDATION. With many many albums already they are one of the most "Bob Marley" like reggae acts I've heard in a while with lyrics like "Music is the Most Hiiiiiiigh." Oh yeah get your summer on early and check em out.

Anyways, be cool my babies

Read this, good old fashioned post.

Ah, Monday. Today was spent at _______ High School teaching Algebra. The kids were good and it was my first time at this notorious school. Freshman and Sophomore's and Math sounds like it could be a horrible day right? No not really, for some reason I was just on fire today. I used my standard secret weapon, I tricked the kids into doing their homework by doing all the problems on the board. Most people would say that this is not really very honest, I disagree, most times I find that the students haven't actually completed a homework assignment in months. By going through each problem and working it out with them many of them respond by being more engaged and actually attempting problems that they never would have tried on their own or in the elusive (free work time). In the end they get a good grade in the grade book and the teacher gets kids with a good day of practice with the skills they want them to learn. I had 12 kids today say that this would be the first homework assignment they turned in all year. Enough said.

What else, hmmm...count down to move day is all that is on my mind. I can't seem to think of anything else. I just can't wait to get this new life started. Mostly because I haven't been playing music at all lately, I've taken a big break, and my new roomate Kyle is a playing machine which will force me into playing and expanding and trying new things. I don't want to be premature in saying this, but I think I will officially be starting a band! And maybe you guys will be able to listen to something different then the horrible old songs that bombard you every time you log on to this silly little blog.

Continuing on. No responses to the little previous dream blog. No bigs, probably not that interesting. I guess I'm trying to figure out just exactly what the hell to do with this space. Lately its been hanging by a thread due to little internet access and general disinterest with life. Where should this blog go, what is the point? I seem to just write about self servient shit that doesn't really mean anything, I mean honestly it has turned into an extended Facebook page. I need to remedy this. How though?

I know a lot of readers liked the weekly features such as "old person phrase of the week" and my suggestions for new music. I just feel like its not really like that any
more. My life has changed. I am in survival mode. In Alaska time, purpose, and money were plentiful. My mission and idea of life was clear. But now, everything is murky and full of uncertain paths. I can't portray a blog of such certain and frequent stability because, in fact, my life lacks those qualities. I think a lot lately about how much I can be an active factor in the change of my life versus the gentle lull of American life that seems to make all vision of real goal achieving seemingly impossible. In the foggy view I know there is something that I am supposed to do but lately I can't see it. Half of me wants to go out there and make a name for myself but the other half of me is getting a little discouraged that I haven't made it simply because I am fucking awesome and deserve a serious shot at showing it.

And then there is love. An additionally ridiculous enigma. Some sort of zen shit happened in Alaska that has been since lost. One of the positive qualities of spending extra ordinate amounts of time alone is that you are forced to become self happy and sufficient. But now that I am back in the civilized world of wonderful people of the opposite sex the age old question returns to my field. Do I need someone to be happy? Hmmmm. Well I don't know yet. I want to be on my own because I feel like there is no way that I can be everything for someone when I'm so lost in the woods, but also, who is to say that someone wouldn't bring me out of that confusion. Its all so muddy and ridiculous sometimes. Life brings clarity one minute and complete bafflement the next. I used to think that if I could imagine a life in which I still lived full and content alone then if that happened I would be able to look back and say at least I was prepared. But, unfortunately (or fortunately) I love people and in the end I meet people and get attached and for a moment (or an extended period) I believe that people carry the key to happiness. I don't fall into the trap of thinking that I'm entitled to happiness but it would be nice. I just don't really, after all the last few years have given me, really know how to go about that, that thing of being happy. Maybe it is what drives us.

So what this entire post is about really isn't clear but hopefully you the reader recognizes it as a return to honesty, which I think, we the blog addicts of the world can agree is the most endearing quality of a good blog post (which honestly this probably isn't). Honesty about your life so that others can read it and maybe figure out what the fuck is going on, or at least realize they aren't as crazy as they thought they were. As I typed that last sentence I had the overwhelming feeling of Doogie Howser M.D. at the end of another moral filled episode where he ex-sponges his realizations on a life lesson learned (que theme music).

Anyways, I just want you to know, yes you, that I'm gonna try harder to bring that daily honesty back to "Radiate Warmth" or now the stupider name "The Good Things" which may soon be called "Stupid Shit to Think About."

Hey, go kick some ass out there.

Flying Dreams, Middle School Dances,

I'm sitting here with my best bro Randolph Lundgren at the Mandolin Cafe when I remembered a dream I had last night where through the use of a special flying squirrel wingsuit I learned the ability to catch wind updrafts from earth and take flight whenever I pleased, often opting to travel at high elevations to soar over the rocky mountains and ocean. Landing was easy once I got the hang of it and although I had to ride the wind this was the first time in my life I can ever remember a flying dream...

"If you are flying with ease and enjoying the scene and landscape below, then it suggests that you are on top of a situation. You have risen above something. It may also mean that you have gained a different perspective on things. Flying dreams and the ability to control your flight is representative of your own personal sense of power." ---Dream Moods.com

I don't know about that but I am pretty excited about moving! And I think the fact that Randy and I watch the Rocketeer might have had something to do with it.

I chaperoned a middle school dance on Friday...blech! I was overcome with several conflicting emotions and thoughts. First, why did dances feel so short when I was their age yet so very excruciatingly long when I chaperoned one. Secondly, I felt so sad for the little guys and girls with seemingly no friends and no one to dance with, let alone any foreseeable chances to dance with someone. Middle school is a cruel time in life.

Also, the DJ was a spiky haired, tight jean wearing, screen printed griffin t-shirt wearing douschbag that played the "Jerk" song over and over again which the kids danced the "jerk" over and over. Middle school Dances...epic fail.

hmmm...what else. Nah, nothin, big move this weekend hopefully and that will mean internet at home soon. I have so much shit to do hopefully I can get it done!

Hello Again....

Ooooookay.

Sorry for the week long absence but life has been progressing on at light speeds. Things are happening, I'm movin and shaking and making some changes, mixin it up, doin the bull dance, feeling the flow.

Although I have sort of failed on many aspects of my new years resolutions, mostly in the daily yoga/working out, and spending less, I have been working a ton and rebuilding something resembling a routine. I don't feel like an epic fail of a person though. I forgot how important a routine can be.

The spearhead of this routine has been tutoring 4 nights a week. I am starting to get to know the kids better, and by having something to occupy my time till 6ish every night seems to make me want to be kind of a shut in after a long day of subbing. That's right, I'm a working man lately. I worked 12 hour days every day last week except for Friday. I worked 4 days at the same school and even began to almost maybe feel like a real teacher again. I really need to focus this week on getting my application information together, updated and out there but there is so much to do.

Why you ask?

Oh because I'm FINALLY MOVING BABY!!!!!! Oh yeah, put your hands up, swing them side to side and do the new house dance! I am so farking pumped to be moving into a real house (3 bed, 1 bath, full front porch, shed, fenced yard with nice grass, oh yeah its only 2 blocks from 6th Ave in T-Town baby), a great new roomate and friend (who will hopefully also be my new band mate when we get settled), we are moving in time to get all set up for summer, get starts going for a garden and get a real home with real life (and maybe a new roomate in a month or so?). I have been in a holding pattern for months now, waiting for a job, waiting for a house, waiting for life to seemingly feel real again not just a foggy dream in which I feel no real responsibility to do anything. With a new house, new chores, new rebuilding, decorating, planting, new music to make, new goals to set, and more importantly, a new (and thankfully much cheaper), home.

How am I supposed to work a twelve hour day, get my application stuff together, pack up all my shit, move, move in, all at the same time while also trying to get up to the mountain to ski? I don't know but with all this activity and excitement I know there won't be any time for sitting around on my ass eating junk food and getting lazy. I got shit to do! Finally! I have a life! Woooo hooo!

Additionally, new people have entered my life, new friends, new friends that not only get along with my current friends, but accent them, that accompany them, that enhance all of our experience. We have been kicking ass for a month and a half together. Halloween, New Years, and recently, our most successful venture yet, Danger Ross and BEATS ANTIQUE at Neumos and subsequent extended weekend of chilling (Sister Act is so good). We had so much fun and made incredible music videos that I hope to post here soon.

So lots of work, sweet new house/home, and amazing new friends (and still awesome old friends). Things could be better (but not much, just need that fulltime salary job and I'm set!). WIth the new house will come internet by the way, so after February 1st-ish you may just start to get that old daily posting on the GOOD THINGS that you're used to.

Thanks for continuing to check in and I hope you are out getting ready for spring/summer. It has been beautiful the last couple of days and I just got a waft of summer fever.