Thursday, August 16, 2007

Thank God for KEXP

swirl above
all is never enough
feel the love
even if its rough
trap the joy
harness the warm
the storm
dive deep below
run fast today
simmer the mellow
know the way
rip the lonely
embrace the void
the one and only
infinite paranoid
energy eternal
vibrant alive
discard infernal
useless diatribe
join the union
quit the team
fall within
the sunbeam
meet the maker
ditch the rest
trip the takers
be what is best
back up the front
come out the back
give up the hunt
step on the crack
intention well
hide nothing
cast a spell
on something
deliver daily
receive often
dance gaily
in soft wind
swing wildly
in the dark
comment mildly
make your mark

So I wrote this poem because the clouds swirl above. I feel like all is never enough unless you feel the love. Sometimes its easy even if its rough. I am just trying to trap the joy so that I can harness the warm life around me. Its impossible to destroy the storm inside me sometimes. But if I think hard I can dive deep below into the sea of my memories and run fast today to a better place. Its hard to remember to simmer the mellow doubts because internally I know the way even if I can't take it always. If I could rip the lonely right out of me and embrace the void I might be the the one and only to release myself from this infinite paranoid state. I want to feel the energy eternal. I want to be a vibrant alive thing. But, I feel like I always have to discard infernal racket and useless diatribe. I had to join the union so I guess I quit the team of anti-establishment. Does that mean I can't fall within the realm of the sunbeam? I don't think I'll ever get to meet the maker. If I do I hope they are one of those makers that would want to ditch the rest of the other makers. This summer I tried to trip the takers but learned I can't always be what is best. I came back up the front of life when I all I really wanted was to come out the back side of my mind. I guess I did give up the hunt. I guess I did step on the crack. But I had an intention well beyond what I could attain. I try to hide nothing but end up veiling everything. Why does life cast a spell on nothing. I don't even have a right to comment on somethings because I will never know. But still I deliver daily what I can and I will never receive often enough what I need. Why is it so hard to dance gaily? When was the last time I felt happy in soft wind? I mean, thats what we all want right? Then why do we swing wildly all the time. Do we always have to be in the dark of things? Maybe if I didn't comment mildly about everything you would truly be able to make your mark on me.

This is what your thoughts look like if you are listening to deep house music on KEXP online stream while sitting in your apartment in a village in the Bering Sea on an island by yourself.


Anonymous said...

Happiness is a soup that must be filled everyday with different varieties of spices and big chunks of meat and vegetables that simmer together until the smell of its fragrance makes you hungry. You begin to salivate and you pour yourself a bowl and every precious spoon filled sip brings warm memories of what went into making this delicious concoction. The time spent toiling over the garden growing the potatoes, watering the plants and feeding the animals, sweating in the fields and bandaging bruised hands, scrapes, burns and bites. You remember how you felt exhausted and worn out and bitter and one time almost threw your hands to the air and let the field just grow over, wild and unkempt. Then you take another sip and know that tomorrow will be a great day full of new ingredients.

Kale, the spice you are adding to your soup will be one for the cook books my friend. I hope you are keeping in good spirits and that this experience does not harden you like an old turnip but gives you a bit of time to marinate. Damn I'm hungrey!

Your good friend

Brett Ortgiesen

Kale's Blog said...

Brett, good to know you're alive and what a response, feel free to add your meaty chunks at your leisure and discretion. They are nourishing and welcomed. Miss the talks already, hope the pad is doing well.

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